Monday, February 27, 2012

George Lucas Couldn't Have Written This One

When my two little boys caught whiff of the re-release of Star Wars in 3D, they memorized its release date and have been begging me every day to take them to see the show.

We made time to see it last Thursday.
They all have their evil Darth Maul faces on, can you tell?

Micah and Hyrum insisted on bringing their light-up and sound sabers to the theater.  If you can't bring noisy light sabers to a Star Wars showing, where can you bring them, I ask?

We were late getting to the theater, so after the ticket taker gave us our 3D classes and as we almost ran down the hall to Theater 3, I told the boys they had to be really quiet going into the show, since it had already started.  Ben was in the lead, and as he turned the corner into the theater, he yelled back to me--"The theater is completely empty . . . "

Don't believe me?
Now that's AWESOME--a private screening of "The Phantom Menace."  I returned to the concession stand to get "real food"--hot dogs only count as real food at the theater or on a campout and only when Mom had no time to get dinner before we left.  I had four drinks, a small bag of popcorn for me, two hot dogs, a pretzel, and one box each of Skittles and Junior Mints.  Don't judge me.  You only get to see "The Phantom Menace" once in 3D in the theater.

What I hadn't thought through was how I would get all the goodies back to my boys.  The snack bar was as deserted as the theater, so the clerk pushed a button and a young man magically appeared to help me carry two drinks while I balanced the other two with all the food on a sturdy cardboard tray.  We joked about him being my personal servant, and he said I'd paid for the private screening so a personal servant was included in my package.  Can you say AWESOME again?  It was.

I got back to the theater, got the boys fed and situated, and Micah turned to Hyrum and said, "Rum, every time Darth Maul comes out, we should turn on our light sabers and fight him, K?"  Another perk of the private screening--light saber duels.  AWESOME!!

This is where our adventure took a turn--before Darth Maul's first appearance, Hyrum turned to me and urgently whined, "My tummy hurts, my tummy hurts, my tummy hurts."  When asked if he was going to throw up, he said yes.  I grabbed that handy, sturdy cardboard carrying tray in one hand and Hyrum in my other hand and we dashed for the exit.

Before we even reached the door of the theater, Hyrum used the cardboard tray (Threw up? Vomited? Puked? what is the most delicate term?).  I was standing right next to a trash can, so I dumped its contents into the can and then did a little evaluation.  What do we do now?

No one else was in the theater.
Eve had already had this bug earlier in the week, and although quite violent, it was very short-lived.
It was "Star Wars."
And no one else was in the theater. Who would it hurt?

I did what any other mother would do.

I took Hyrum back to his seat, snuggled him down, and we finished the movie.

Four more times Hyrum filled (and I dumped) that tray, each time refusing to take his eyes off Qui-Gon Jinn (picture that.  It was really funny).  Then he would sit back down, exhausted from heaving his guts, wipe his face with a napkin, then pull my sleeve and ask, "Can I have a piece of gum?"  You sure can, Buddy.

Micah wandered down to the concourse and continued to fight Darth Maul:

Of course he was Obi-Wan Kenobi, his hero and Halloween alter-ego.  I was laughing so hard as I would film the fights, watching Micah hold his hands over his head when Ewan McGregor was suspended in the shaft, then ignite his saber at just the right moment. Being in that huge theater and in 3D, it's as close as he'll ever get to living that dream.

Hyrum never faded from the fight either.  You can hear him in this last clip:
See?  He really did get cut in half by the hero.

And Ben?

Ben was sitting one seat away from Hyrum, and he had not even noticed Hyrum puking three feet away, nor me walking back and forth to the trash can by the door.

That's the power of Star Wars.

This is one movie experience I will NEVER forget.  And now, neither will you.  Can you say



  1. now that is a die hard fan of star wars that he never missed a beat while puking his guts up! i guess they cleared it just for y'all knowing in couldn't have worked out any better!!

  2. This is the best blog post of ANY blog. If there were academy awards for the best blog post of the year, you would be taking them all. I Love it, all of it. Having a theatre to yourself is epic. I love that you stayed at the movie and even stayed on throw up duty. You absolutely deserve an award for that alone. I'm a retired ER nurse and I can see and deal with anything, but I can't handle throw up. It has an equal rating with child birth. I would actually rather go through child birth than deal with throwing up.

  3. I will second that - AWESOME! Theater all to yourselves - WOW - I'd say that was meant to be given the puking. It sure doesn't seem he let that ruin the movie. We LOVE Star Wars around here. Christmas 1997 when my oldest was 12, we bought the Star Wars Trilogy, just out on VHS - and told him he was in for a treat - boy was he ever & he became Star Wars biggest fan. Second biggest fan? His little brother, who, at 19, still 'plays' with his light saber, much to the chagrin of his sister. Gotta love Star Wars!

  4. This will be a treasured memory for your boys... and me! I haven't laughed this hard for a while- Thanks for making me feel like I was there!

  5. I didn't even know that was out! Boy I'm really slipping. I always see all the Star Wars and Harry Potters.~Ames

  6. Only you, Jen... only you... I don't know how you manage to have these awesome (and not so awesome) things happen to you, but it makes for a good story! By the way, you were right about Scottsdale. Loved it.

  7. Oh my heck!
    Only you.
    I swear.
    Only you.
    I'm laughing.

    Glad to know that there was compassion oozing from the siblings and lots of concern for Hyrums well being.

    I love it.

  8. Jen, this one had everything - some things I'm sure you could have done without! Your boys will never, ever forget that movie.

  9. You will never forget it..that is for sure. A total gift that no one else was there...and even though he felt miserable, he still got to see the movie. Poor little guy! The power of Star Wars...and light saber. And you are Mom of the light year!

  10. my two girlfriends and i had the theater to ourselves when we saw breaking dawn. so much fun to sit and chat and do whatever we wanted!

  11. This is too funny. It's easy to see that you are a seasoned mom.

    Love it!