Monday, June 11, 2012

Hyrum has really been missing the structure brought with school--unpredictable days and even more unpredictable nap schedules.  He has become even more aggressive and impulsive and it's about to drive me crazy.  My temper has gotten shorter and his stints in the corner have become increasingly frequent.  In fact, tonight he is in bed screaming for me to rescind his early bedtime punishment for punching Ben you-know-where.

Case in point:  Micah had spent almost an hour building an elaborate fort out of blocks.  He had incorporated sticky note flags and Ritz cracker drawbridges--it was a work of art.  I had rounded up the little boys to clean out their drawers and closet and told Micah he could return to his fort when we were done.  Hyrum detoured past the masterpiece and summarily flattened it.  I let my temper escape and I yelled at him and spanked him and sent him to his room.

In the meantime, Micah was a puddle of tears over his blocks and I comforted him as I tried to corral my anger.  I walked to Evie's room to remove myself from Hyrum's screams of injustice and hatred, composed myself into the rational mom I should have been, then walked back to the little boys' room.

By this time, Hyrum was contrite and, more important, quiet--ready to listen.  I took his hand and led him to the story chair where I was prepared to lecture him.  Instead, he folded himself up in my lap, snuggled his head down on my shoulder and we just sat.

I tickled his brown back for a few minutes as I inhaled his summer mix of sweaty boy and chlorine.  I held his hand for a moment and then I ruffled his hair.  His small arms crept around my neck and he was still and silent for almost three minutes.  I took the opportunity to apologize to my little son--my little son who has an enormous spirit trapped inside a small, inexperienced body.  I told him I was sorry I had gotten so angry with him, explained to him that I am his mom and it's my job to teach him how to act.

"Hyrum, I love you.  You know that?"  His barely perceptible nod just nudged his head deeper into my shoulder--a tender gesture that erased all the hurt from before. 

Reluctantly, I broke the spell and we were off to finish his room.

Dear Father, please bless me with a heart as swift to forgive as that of my five-year-old boy.

Scorpion sting update:  After a miserable Sunday, I strapped on my shoes and beat back the beast.  Although the numbness is isolated to just three toes now, I experienced three-four disturbing bouts of dizziness that threatened to bring me to my knees.  As of tonight, I think it's mostly behind me.  Plus we had a successful scorpion hunt tonight--eight sighted, seven destroyed.  


  1. This story melted my heart...such a great reminder for us moms to remember to not react out of anger...which I often find myself doing. I'm so glad you shared this.

  2. Your experience with Hyrum echoes down through the ages - what mum hasn't had such a moment and then been blessed by her child's tenderness and love?
    Eight scorpions?! I hope you find the missing one before it finds you!

  3. That little Hyrum story put tears in my eyes. My youngest son was like Hyrum - intense and engine throttle fully open at all times. He was/is a challenge for peace-loving me to deal with, but there is no one sweeter or more loving than that little boy who is now a sweet but intense man. One thing we learned was that when he would have episodes of violent fist-swinging tantrums, it coincided with a blood sugar drop. Solution: feed the beast a snack. Worked every time, the beast became sweet and contrite, and happily, he outgrew it.
    Glad your scorpion hunt was productive. Egads!

  4. Once I got so mad at my teenage son that, as he claims, I started "jumping up and down, red-faced, like Rumpelstiltskin." (I think he is correct in this claim.)

    We've all done it at one time or another...


    Ps. Fortunately, we have NOT all been stung by a scorpion!! Hope all your symptoms are a thing of the past.

  5. At least he didn't hide from you! He is such a bundle of energy! Sometime resistance is futile!

    I am glad you are feeling better!

  6. new routines are rough.
    scorpions=no bueno.

  7. Every mom can relate to this. It brought many of my own memories of similar mothering moments to mind. I always apologized to my girls if I lost my temper. He will remember the snuggle not the anger.
    Once again, so so glad there aren't any scorpions in these here parts.