Tuesday, February 8, 2011

We Never Know

Any other day, any other time, and he would have been in big trouble. Can you tell Hyrum has been here?
I left my lesson preparations out on the library table, and he just couldn't resist "marking" my bookmark.  Green and blue added to my red.  What's the problem?

If it had been an ordinary day, I would have yelled at him, punished him, sent him to the corner.

But yesterday wasn't an ordinary day.

I came home from errands, started lunch for my two little monkeys, then went upstairs to check my messages.  Message from Idaho--my sister.  A dear friend from high school and an accident.  She lost her three-year-old son Sunday.  He had been riding the tractor and fell.

Gone.

Losing a child is painful and difficult.  And losing one so suddenly and so tragically must be worse--the hardest thing any parent must bear in life.  My heart searched for this friend--a woman I have seen rarely since high school twenty-four years ago.  A friend I shared many things with--a friend who taught me many things and embodies many qualities I wish I had.  A friend who is now mourning and missing and blaming and questioning and breaking.

I am so sorry.

These events always make our own loved ones appear less human and more divine--less naughty and more loved.  Less neglected and more cherished.

I took my own precious three-year-old son in my arms, read him a story, hugged him close.  Tucked him into his bed for a nap, wrapped in his ratty silky. And sang him two songs, just because he asked.
Then, I went to the library, picked up that bookmark, and decided it will forever mark this day in my heart.

Hold them close today.  You never know when it will be the last.

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26 comments:

  1. Hyrum was the first thing I thought of, too, when I was told of the accident. How fleeting and precious can be the lives of those we love.

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  2. Hold on - to every minute with those precious little ones.

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  3. that's how I felt after the child's funeral I went to last Friday...
    you just never know when your last hug is your last hug.

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  4. Life is risky business, isn't it? And we are so not in control.

    I will be praying for your friend. And reminding myself, as I am wont to do lately, that the Lord knows what He is doing.

    I know that to be true. I do. But sometimes I just wish we could appeal these sad decisions.

    =(

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  5. thank you for sharing this. truly.

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  6. Amen to that sister. We should try to live like that daily, but it's not always possible because we forget how fregile life is and then it hits us.
    I have to remember "Families Are Forever" through the grief of something like this.

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  7. I am so sorry. We just don't know what is in store today. All the better reason to love each other more lovingly.

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  8. Saying a prayer for that family today. I can't imagine their pain. xoxo

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  9. So sorry for that family. It does make you stop and enjoy every single minute.

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  10. How wonderful it is that he have the gospel in our lives and KNOW where Thomas is and that he can be with his family again someday. Such a lesson in humility.

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  11. Such a sad story and so true about holding every momoent special! I worked with a lady today that just lost a 22 year old son...she was returning to work for the first time. So hard! And yesterday e-mailed a friend who lost brother 66 years of age...her mother was grieving terribly. At any age a mother never wantes to lose a child...but the thought of a sweet 3 year old is unimaginable.
    Only one thought...life for everyone WILL end...enjoy every moment as you said, with the comforting knowledge that we will be reunited someday.

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  12. oh man is that ever a tragedy - i can't imagine there's any worse pain to bear on earth than that of losing a child ... saying an extra prayer and going to hug my babies - right now!

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  13. UGHHHHHH! These things are just too much for my heart to take. I'm so sorry for your friend.

    Thanks for writing this, and HOW your wrote it. I've really been feeling the need to cherish each moment with my kids lately.

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  14. I can't believe I am reading about another child in a fatal accident. Honestly, so many have happened in just the last week or so. I also can't imagine what it would be like to lose a child. Parents really are supposed to outlive their children. Hard hard hard to undertand.

    You are such a great writer, Your description of the whole day was so vivid that I cried through reading it all.

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  15. give her my number or email or whatever.... isabella is currently throwing one of her 2 year old tantrums and i honestly think that it couldn't be cuter :)

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  16. Thanks for the reminder- my Em has been more monster than child lately, and your post made me think about how empty life would be without the occasional monster in it.

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  17. Well said! I am sometimes accused of being overprotective, overaffectionate, overly motherly (is there such a thing?) - Let's just say I don't think that mother's can ever over-do-it when it comes to their kids.
    My heart aches for you friend and her loss.

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  18. Oh, there is so much truth in this post. Why we forget this, is beyond me. Thanks for the reminder. Now excuse me while I go and play with my kids.

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  19. Oh my goodness! That is just heartbreaking!
    That book mark will become more precious to you than ever.

    I love the picture of him sleeping. That one goes on your heart forever.

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  20. I'm sorry to hear about what happened to your friend... It's always so sad that it's these types of tragedy that makes us pause and remember just how fragile life can be.

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  21. I am sorry to hear about your friend's little boy. Such a tragedy. I will pray for her as well as her family.

    ~ Tracy

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  22. so hard to understand...my heart aches for their loss. thoughts and prayers.

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  23. I can't even imagine losing a little one. :(

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  24. Oh no...
    What a terrible thing to have happen. I'm so sorry for your friend and her family.

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