Monday, February 7, 2011

Dear Micah

Dear Micah,

Remember when you wanted to audition for the school talent show?  I know you'll never remember.

Remember the discussion we had about which song to play--you wanted to play "Snake Dance," but I wanted "Home on the Range"?  I convinced you I was right.

Remember going to the audition?  Your little legs barely hung halfway to the floor, swinging back and forth as you waited your turn.

Remember how nervous you were?  You were so quiet and so determined.  A little first-grade boy, and not a single mistake.  Notes were perfect, timing was perfect.

Remember walking out of the auditorium, your hand in mine?  You were so proud.  And so was I.

Remember coming home from school the next day, bottom lip quivering?  I asked you what was wrong, and you barely eked out the words, "I didn't make it," before the tears started flowing.

Remember crawling up into my lap and sobbing on my shoulder, my arms wrapped around your spindly little body?  You sat there for almost ten minutes, nothing could make it better.

Remember me suggesting we watch "Peter Pan" and make popcorn, and worry about homework later?  This finally cheered you up a little.

You are a little boy, and I know you'll never remember such a day.  But I will never forget how it felt to be your mom.  I was so proud of you.  And so heartbroken for you.  You will have many chances left to show your talents.  And I know you will.

I was just grateful to be the one who could make the world right again.

I love you.



  1. Awww... We do, as parents, hurt for our children's disappointments as much or more than they do. (Didn't you secretly want to go kick the buttocks of the person who dissed little Micah?) :o(

  2. *sniff sniff* ... aaaw, now i'm all kinds of heartbroken too - so proud of him for trying so hard, so disappointed for him not to have made the cut, so furious that anyone would deny that sweet boy!! ROAR!

  3. That more than breaks my sort of makes me mad too. How could they not take a 1st grader piano player as adorable as Micah? Hope it has nothing to do with that teacher and...well.

    Anyway, thank goodness you were able to ease the pain a little bit. I'm so NOT looking forward to moments like that. It hurts my heart TOO much.

  4. Yeah! What a great Mom!!!!
    I wish he would have made it, but there will be many successes in the future. So much better to fail when there is someone so sweet and thoughtful and able to fix it around!

  5. Our kids never know how much we suffer for them until they have kids of their own and then they are too busy suffering for their own kids to acknowledge our prior suffering for them.

    Beautifully written.

  6. That was such a great post.
    I'm sure Micah will remember.
    Maybe not the event, but he'll remember his mama's love and feeling secure.

  7. Awwww.... Poor little guy. And he even played it perfectly? How rude to not let him in!!

  8. a first grader's piano solo didn't make it?
    how could that be? This isn't Juilliard's right?
    Poor little guy. Way to BE, though, MOM!

  9. Oh Jen,
    These are the heartbreaking mom moments aren't they. You tell Micah Theatre is fickle. It was likely that he wasn't tall enough or didn't have the right colour hair, even though he rocked his audition. It often has very little to do with who is actually talented. Believe me I know. He will remember, these moments sear into our brains, and I hope what is crystal clear is how wonderful that hug and popcorn were.
    Truly these are hardest moments in life aren't they. When we can't protect our children from disappointment and hurt.

  10. What a brave boy for trying out! I love that Peter Pan and popcorn with mom made it better- what a great boy.

  11. Jen, I know I have said this before, but you always remind me of the priviledege of being a mom. . .that it is so much more than the day to day struggles!

    Thanks for sharing your heart with us!

  12. Wow, that breaks my heart. Having been to that talent show many times over it's hard for me to imagine there wasn't a place for him. Not enough of the little ones get to participate as it is. I'm sorry. But what a wonderful mommy moment.

  13. Their loss, Micah!


    (PS. How could they resist him?)

  14. ok hello tears of just having a baby and reading this! how precious was he? i'd have gone and kicked some booty for not having my little man make it! i hate life's lessons though...

    sweet post

  15. oooooh! Yep, been there...both as a child and as a parent! I would have had a MILLION disappointments rather than have ONE of my children feel this way. Life's hard, huh? You are a GREAT mom!!

  16. "Making the world right again" is what it's all about isn't it?
    So sorry for your little sweetie
    Hugs to you all

  17. You make me cry again. Thank you for expressing yourself the way you do.

  18. This is such a sweet post. This is a nice thing for him to read when he is older. :)